I wonder about the exact depth that archery has changed me as a person... The most obvious was how much i finally started training at something, how much effort i finally decided to give something that wasn't related to writing. But now i think there's so much more than just that... I think i'm a lot more relaxed, a lot more calmed... In fact, if you asked me to beat up a guy now, i doubt i'd even give him a sucker punch.

Which brings me to the reason to as why i started wondering about something like this... See today, i was shooting and suddenly, out of no where, these two fuckers came up from behind me and walked into the firing area. And they kept walking like it was no body's business, past the safety barricade and everything...

Ok, this is what the old me would've done. I'd have loaded the last arrow in my quiver, taken a pot shot at them, and then thrown my bow at their faces when they turned around, and after they, predictably, come to fight me i'd have, hopefully, given them the beating of their lives. I even knew what they'd use as weapons - the helmets they had on their arms. Once you've been in so many fucked up fights with these kinds of lowlifes, you tend to expect things.

But the new me, loaded the last arrow, let my bow hang and watched their backs, though not entirely without deep hatred and malice. And after they walked away, i shot - the last bit of my effort pushing my aim to the board and not at their backs.

Yes... My anger has been put on an entirely new leash... I used to be very hardened when it came to fighting... Even when i was smaller i'd readily pick fights with say, secondary school students or even the occasional ones with adults. Then came certain incidents in my life and my mother placed this uber seal on my anger energies. Every time i got pissed and wanted to beat the fuck out of people, i'd hold it back because i remembered what my mom said. But eventually that restraint started to slack and i started whacking people without care again. I, of course, always forgave my friends... Since i did swear once that i would always protect friends with my own blood. I think archery has helped me control that anger rather than just leash it up.

So i guess unless someone does something seriously stupid to tick me off... I won't be whacking anyone too soon... I even threw down my knuckle braces... Lol... I remember the last guy i punched with those... I bet some of my mates read this and go, wtf? I don't think Jacob would do that... Well, you're my mate, and i'll make sure you don't ever see me do stuff like that... The me you see seems a lot safer, no?